Growing Up Dutch--Pennsylvania That Is

Not all self-proclaimed "foodies" were born with a worldly palate. In fact, some of us are reared in the woodsy terrain of Pennsylvania's northeast Pocono region, not exactly an epicurean hotbed. Growing up, I preferred individually wrapped Velveeta to crumbly, aged roquefort and you couldn't pay me to look in a mushroom's direction. I ate so much sausage and homemade mashed potatoes and gravy during childhood I still can't choke down a spoonfull of even the smoothest, creamiest Yukon golds at a fine Bay Area restaurant. Still, this unique region does possess a cultural, culinary phenomenon all its own, and like it or not, it steered my own palate toward fearless ingestion later in life. My friends, open your eyes--but maybe not your mouths--to life in Pennsylvania Dutch country.

To understand Pennsylvania Dutch cuisine is to understand the PA Dutch themselves. Not to be confused with the Amish, these people are really just the sons and daughters of German immigrants who came to the state around 1800. Along with their unique eating habits, they also possess their own dialect, a blend of several that melds German with American English. Understanding the lingo might help an outsider along while navigating the popular foods of these native Pennsylvanians. I've gathered a small list of the more common fare served at holidays, county fairs, family reunions and local grocery stores.

Scrapple - When I was young, my grandfather was a hard working, well-liked butcher in our community. Our small town still honored the specified trade workers and were happy to make the extra trip to the stand-alone concrete building where they purchased their meats and cheeses. And it was at the butcher shop that I discovered a curious, meat-like substance called scrapple. The closest "universal" food I can liken scrapple to would be SPAM. Scrapple is simply the leftovers, literally the scraps and bi-products of other meats. Scrapple is a popular breakfast food amongst the PA Dutch, so don't be surprised if you see it on a roadside diner's menu.

Apple Butter - This sweet spreadable (not really a butter at all) can be slathered on anything from toast to saltines. With its deep brown color, apple butter is a more concentrated form of apple sauce often spiced with nutmeg, cinnamon or cloves.

Pork and Sauerkraut - In my family, pork and sauerkraut was a New Year's Day staple. The PA Dutch consider this dish a "good luck" charm at the dawn of a new year, and let it simmer all day to dinner time. Cabbage is traditional fare amongst the PA Dutch, and the addition of swine and mashed potatoes makes this dish a delicacy.

Lebanon - Another meat that takes me back to the days of sitting on the counter at the butcher shop. Lebanon bologna is a lunchmeat that is cured, smoked and fermented. Its tangy, peppery flavor is best matched with a slice of white American cheese, mayo and mustard sandwiched between two slices of white bread. Lunch!

Hot Bacon Dressing - Not quite gravy, not quite salad dressing, this hot "dressing" is typically served over a bed of cold iceburg lettuce, but most PA Dutch will drizzle it over their meats and other veggies. I discovered many variations of the recipe online, but the Dutch version is a sweet and tangy vinaigrette thickened through flour.

Funnel Cake - Also known as "Elephant's Ears" to locals, this fried, lacey pastry dish dowsed with powdered sugar is a must at county fairs and festivals. To make this lattice-like dessert, dough is funneled into hot oil, creating mazes of spirals and fried until golden-brown. Powdered sugar is then sifted on top and sometimes thick, homemade jams on top of that. Word to the wise, share this devilishly good treat or you could be packing in as much as 977 calories and 44 grams of fat. According to University of Illinois researchers, it would take about 9 hours to walk the 13,000 steps to burn off that cake. That's about 25 times to many passed the livestock pens and demolition derby.

Shoofly Pie - This quintessential PA Dutch dessert's name has a great ring to it...and tastes good to boot. A molasses-based dish topped with coffee cake-esque buttery crumbles takes me back to grade school where one of my teachers made the best Shoofly pie around. You might find a homemade version of this by they slice at a local restaurant or diner, and I can almost guarantee, you won't be disappointed.

Wos-Wit - While this isn't a specific food or dish itself, I couldn't write an article on PA Dutch food without the mention of a well-known PA Dutch label, Wos-Wit. Found on many local grocery shelves, Wos-Wit packages anything from bacon dressing to sour cherry preserves to pig's tongue, yep, pig's licker in a jar. Wos-Wit's literal translation is "What do you want?" and products are grown or raised on a family farm in Schuykill County.

To save my waistline, I jetted to New England at 18 and discovered there's more to life than pretzels slathered in Cheeze Whiz and macaroni salad swimming in Hellman's. Now I'm living in California where I'm pretty certain avocado is the fattiest food allowed by law. I still return several times a year, however, and indulge in some form of PA Dutch food, my favorite being homemade pickled beets. At the end of the day, every region has its own cuisine, and I have to be glad that mine has its very own heritage associated with it, no matter how quirky.

Stay tuned for more from the Pennsylvania front lines as I'll be back home from March 4-9. There are birthdays to celebrate, so hopefully I'll grab a piece of Shoofly pie. Mm, mmm.